Insecurity is prevalent and it's insidious. It effects everyone at some time or other - the rich and famous, and the poor and infamous. Even John Lennon once said, "I was feeling insecure you might not love me anymore."
And insecurity plays in the minds and emotions of more leaders than you and I ever want to imagine. (I have myself felt at times that I have an earned Ph.D. in insecurity...and I feel insecure telling you that!)
The "I-word" causes leaders to make decisions based upon pleasing people or pleasing God. Motives change. And it's at that point that every leader needs to step back, get honest, and say, "All I’m really doing here is seeking the approval of my father, or that lady, or the church boss." THIS WILL ALWAYS LEAD A LEADER ASTRAY OVER TIME.
Here’s the danger … I risk burnout due to impure motives and unrealistic expectations.
There's a vivid illustration of this in Luke 10. Jesus visits the home of Martha, Mary, and Lazarus. Martha was committed to host a big soiree' and dinner for Jesus; but she had crossed the line from serving to performing. She was in a compulsive, people-pleasing mood that night. “Hey, look at me! Clap for me!”
Remember what she eventually said? “Lord, tell my sister to come in here and help me! She’s leaving me here to do all the work!” You know what I think Martha was really doing here? I think she was looking for Jesus to say to her, “Oh my goodness, Martha, bless your heart. I had no idea. Everyone! Stop whatever it is you are doing – Peter, be quiet over there and listen! Look at Martha. Let’s give her a round of applause. She's doing all this ministry work alone. What a servant! She is our mentor and we should all strive to be just like her. Martha, you’re the greatest!” That’s the kind of Jesus Martha wanted in her home that evening.
I am floored by Jesus’ response to her. He recognized it as a compulsive act that was not rooted in service or love. “Martha, Martha. You are worried about so many things. There is really only one thing to be concerned about. Look at Mary; look at your sister.” She was in a quiet repose, sitting at His feet ... a worshipper.
Jesus was saying, “You must first be served by me before you can serve me.” Martha, relax. It’s devotion, not duty. Martha was a human doing before she was a human being. Do you recall Jesus' words from Matthew 11? "Come to me all you who are weary and heavy laden and I will give you rest for your souls. Take my yoke, learn from me." Rest for your souls.
We can learn a number of lessons from Martha. Here’s what happens when I become like Martha:
1. I get distracted from “big picture” priorities, consumed by my own performance, constantly nagged by the thought of what others will think of me.
2. I grow weary because I attempt to do too much–for the wrong reasons.
3. I tend to become a perfectionist. And perfectionism can never last long.
In your push to make the team, earn the grade, attain the promotion, please the boss or client, make everyone in your church happy - remember that compulsive behaviour is a symptom of insecurity. It's devotion, not duty.
“By the grace of God, I am what I am, and His grace toward me did not prove to be vain; but I labored even more than all of them, yet not I but the grace of God within me.” (I Corinthians 15:10)
